Back on MY Bullshit
Hello Queens! The bitch is back and ready to tackle this year. I had to take a short retirement due to my study abroad travels. Though, no worries because here I am, the bitch who shoves motivation down your throat. But if you don't know anything about me, feel free to stray over to my "About Me" tab and read some older articles! But for now, I want to dive right in because I have gone through so much in the last few months and have learned a lot about myself. I have also seen and heard about a lot of my queens who are going through similar things. But I will give some background so y’all can understand a little bit more about the bitch behind the blog that isn't listed in the "About Me.
So, in a land before time, ya girl had a whole man for 2 years. Long story short, I realized he wasn’t the one and he had to go. Even though it was one of the hardest things I have ever done in my life, ya girl did it. After that, I gave myself an allotted amount of time to be sad and deal with it, then got over it and pushed myself to be the bad bitch I knew I was. Was it hard? HELL YEAH. Did I do it? Of fucking course. I realized that I wouldn’t make progress with myself if I was stuck on some not shit guy who didn’t treat me like I deserved. So, instead of diving into finding another man and going back into the sea to what the fresh catch of the day was, I decided to put all my energy into myself. I had a dope ass summer (since I left his ass in June 2017), then had a great Junior fall semester. After the fall, I had a short Christmas break then got to study abroad on an island in the Mediterranean which sadly came to an end and lead me to live at the beach in Delaware and slave away my life to regain my bank account. SO, within that crazy busy year, I took a lot of time to really invest in myself by finding out what I like, what I want out of life, and more importantly who I want to be. Of course, just like any other lesson, I’m still learning but this has been my favorite class; ME 101. After my relationship I never wanted to let someone dictate my emotions to the point where I lose who I am every again. I decided that I wouldn’t allow myself to put that much energy into someone, UNLESS it was obvious that they were putting the same energy into me. I think this is something we, as woman, struggle with a lot.
Don’t get me wrong sis, there’s a lot of fine as men out there. But, I can guarantee you that there are none worth losing yourself over. The main question though is, did you even know who you were before you lost yourself? Yeah, I know y’all weren’t ready for that because I sure as hell wasn’t. But think about it. Were you aware you were a bad bitch? Well, you fucking are. I think the issue we struggle with is that we just want to give love and receive love but we often do it in the wrong places. Though, no matter how hard and how much you want to love, you can’t unless you love yourself. YOU WILL NEVER BE ABLE TO LOVE SOMEONE ELSE UNLESS YOU LEARN TO LOVE YOURSELF FIRST. Point, blank, period, mic drop.
I am still taking time to myself and learning new things about myself every day but while I am doing all of that, I am learning to love and appreciate the woman I am becoming along with the effort I am putting in. If I can encourage you to do anything, it would be to stop where you are (unless you’re in the street or in the middle of the sidewalk because that shit is annoying) take a breath, get into some deep thought, and truly think about the last time you were proud of your overall self. Well honey, I can guarantee that the man on the second floor who has been playing 2K for 17 days straight, the girl who thinks she’s a bigger pimp than P Diddy (I don’t judge so I’m giving all possibilities) or the frat guy from tri kappa kiss my ass isn’t going to help you accomplish that. Every single one of my queens are so beyond capable of reaching their full potential shorter rather than later. You all have so much beauty, grace and education that can take you far but you just need to realize it. I encourage my ladies to invest in the best stock that they can, the self-love company…. That was really corny, I’m aware but I’m a business major and I think I’m funny so I went with it. ANYWAY, 2018 may almost be over but don’t wait until the new year to start making changes. Now, I never said the shit wasn’t hard but I did say you can do it so I want you to believe so. Whatever you want to accomplish, you will be able to do it because I believe in you. I promise if you commit yourself to bettering yourself in any way you want, you will feel rewarded and come to find that you are INDEED THAT BITCH.
I will be abiding by the good ol’ phrase, back on MY bullshit but with a different meaning. Instead of the emphasis being in bullshit where I fuck around, I’m putting the emphasis on MY. So, this means that I will be on my bullshit by investing in MYself and doing things that pertain to ME as well as doing things that make MYself a happier and better person. If you want to join my little self-investment movement, feel free! I am here to encourage all my women. My goal with this blog is for every single one of you to realize you are all queens at the end of the day and you’re worth more than you know. I am confident in all of you and I want you to be confidence in yourself. Never settle for less than you deserve, treat yourself like the queen you are!
XOXO, one queen to another,