Men are a myth

Hello my beautiful queens. So we're out here looking for the kings right.... well this one is for us and them! The time has come and I am finally writing the blog that I've been talking about for a few weeks on my social media. Through lots of research, testing and experiments I have determined that MEN ARE INDEED A MYTH. If you are a male reader, I am not here to bash you but here to share MY theories on how the male species thinks and acts so don't stop here because it gets good I swear.

As a 20 year old woman, I have had a decent amount of encounters with the male species or have been told about other women's encounters. Through experience and listening to others I have come up with a theory based on the thoughts and actions of a male in their 20's (more biased towards my experiences). I understand that I am not a male and don't live the life they live but as a female, I have perceptions of male actions. Now I only limit it to 20's for obvious reasons (my age) but I know older men who struggle and have similar hardships.

The time of being 20-29 years old is the prime time to figure out who you are, what you want to be and what you want to do with your life. As we all know, that shit is scary AF but we have to do it. Some of us are working, some of us are in school, some of us are doing both and some of us still aren't sure what the plan is. When it comes to males, they typically take a little longer to find their path and that's okay because there isn't a rush though but there is a "preferred" time frame that comes from society. I also heard in a documentary that a male's brain doesn't fully develop until their 25 and just because it's developed doesn't mean they know how to properly use it. (relax, that was funny) I personally feel that males are more hesitant to challenge themselves because they don't want want to fail. Let's be honest, no one wants to fail but instead of challenging themselves, males tend to stay where they are comfortable or tend to be in denial that their lives need change or progress. Many males know they need to figure their lives out during their 20's but they tend to put it on hold while they are busy having fun. Also, males are humans (I think) and even though they don't seem like their effected from their current or past life, they most likely are. I have found that more males I know suffer from "daddy issues" compared to girls. Whether their dad wasn't in their life or that the dad was in the picture but wasn't emotional, supportive or compassionate toward them like a parent should be. I'm not saying all males struggle from this but I'm saying it happens and people may not realize.

Though the difference between men and women is that men cherish their egos more. When a male "gets pushed down" (figuratively), they tend to stay down longer because they don't want anyone (especially other males) to realize that they're struggling. Now, most of this comes from bigger issues. Society has taught everyone that men shouldn't show emotions, hardships or any type of feelings in general without being called "weak." (another reason why fathers may hold back from showing compassion to their sons) You could tell a male that it's okay to open up a million times and you'll be lucky to get a hint of their feelings. Though, I am generalizing, of course not everyone is the same and I know males who have opened up but they're typically very specific about how they do it. When a male opens up, you have to continuously ask questions and almost pull them apart because of how vague they are. I also know males who have fully opened up but it's very uncommon. Like I said before, none of this is to bash men, but rather to share my views on how I analyze the male brain.

I have a very close male friend that I have shared this theory with. For my blog, I will name this friend Carl instead of using his real name. He's opened up to me a lot about his life. Carl has shared his fears and concerns about who he thinks he is but knows who he wants to be. I know Carl will be successful one day but his delay from accepting reality is holding him back. He also struggles with having no one to really open up to besides me which is okay, but I'm away at school so I'm not home enough to help him immediately. I've realized that many males have their "bros" but are they really your bros if they can't help you when you need it? I can only imagine what other males go through, if they're not going through the same stuff. I think being a male is more complicated than most people think.

I also have another male friend who fears opening up because he's worried he will get let down and fears that people will think he is weak. Side note, STOP GIVING A FLYING FUCK ABOUT WHAT OTHERS THINK. YOU LIVE YOUR OWN LIFE, NO ONE ELSE'S.

So why am I saying "men are a myth" and how does that even deal with women? Well men are a non-existent, at least at this age, THOUGH boys are abundant. The differences between a boy and man is simple.

A boy:

- won't accept his emotions

- fears the hardships of life

- plays games rather than realizing the bigger picture

- puts his immaturity and ego to a high level

A man:

- will accept his wrong doing and express how he feels about it

- pushes himself even when things go to shit

- realize the end goals rather than the temporary

- most likely still immature because I don't think males ever fully mature

NOW, before you think I'm attacking the males, I will admit that I am biased as a woman (naturally) BUT also because I have only dealt with boys. Is it my fault that I've only had experience with boys rather then "men"? Honestly it probably is my fault but I tend to see the best in people. I don't think all men are childish but when come across one I'll let y'all know. Anyway, this logic works the same for females. I have met many girls among women. Within our age bracket and older, you can come across very childish, immature, girls who aren't realizing the bigger picture as well, but that's for another day.

Back to the point, men are not fully a myth, but they are more of a myth at this age. It's rare to find a genuine male (I think they're hidden in a cave or their mom's basement) who is willing to accept his baggage.

This is where females get involved. When relationships are built and developed shit eventually hits the fan because they are now dealing with each others baggage on top of their own. YOU CAN NOT BE WITH SOMEONE ELSE UNTIL YOU FIGURE YOURSELF OUT FIRST.

Women are known to be more mature, at any age, that's just a common well known fact. So, our struggle is dealing with these boys who aren't ready for what we want nor willing to work for it or sometimes lying for their own childish gain. There is nothing worse than being pursued just to have your time wasted or being lied to.

I think the biggest hurdle is this communication barrier between male and female. Females speak with emotion, over thought out logic, and long term goals while men tend to speak more with short logic, ego, agression and quick/easy answers.

I think what I'm trying to get at is our twenties are rough. It's our last chance to be true fuck ups before we are sent into true adulthood. But, in the midst of having fun and enjoying the last bit of freedom, we all need to realize the bigger picture. This post was directed toward males and females (sorry, to all my girls who thought I was going to full on trash men, we can do that in our free time). It's commonly known for females to be more mature than males, so really the point was to express frustrations and how I analyzed male thinking. I may sound like a single, bitter bitch or like I hate men but I'm not (but I'm going to be if someone says some slick shit one more GOTTTTTTT damn time). I am so happy and content with my life and I appreciate the male species because I believe in equality. Though, I wrote this because it's just been something on my mind. I think there is a lot of pressure from society to have "that person" and the perfect relationship but I think we have bigger things to take care of right now. I'm trying to work hard for my degree and career right now, so if someone comes along in the mean time, great, if not I'll just stay positive and focus on myself, which I have been doing anyway. My flaw is that I tend to generalize so I understand that not every male is the same, but I have found that most males can relate to at least one of the many points I've made. I had a few of my close guy friends go over this so I had insight from males as well. I got a lot of good and constructive feedback for this piece and I hope everyone enjoys it. I'm sure if any males read this, they still won't understand because the male race will never understand the male race.

(P.S If anyone wants to share their perspectives, ask questions or talk about anything, I am open to it completely. You can send me an email in my feedback tab and I believe you can make it anonymous if you put a random email)